WalMart sells replacement plans for Cabbage Patch dolls. At WalMart, I was helped by a man named Dexter wearing a long-​​​​sleeved Henley shirt. I went to two Targets, a Giant Eagle, a Home Depot, and a WalMart today. I encoun­tered two charity collection drives. A Salvation Army bell ringer, and a Firefighters’ Union toy drive. Both were stationed outside the WalMart. I have done something I never expected to do. I purchased an arti­ficial Christmas tree. Forgive me.

My soul has been broken for so long I’ve forgotten what it feels like to be alive. That white hot electric shine of meeting each moment knowing, with full certainty, who I am and how to meet the next challenge barreling down on me. The quiet serenity of confi­dence in my ability to meet the future, and the blazing inferno of rage that anything should stand in my way. That secret, sacred, insa­tiable center feels cold and empty and dead. It has for some time. I’m 29 years old and I don’t think I can honestly say I’ve ever really truly been in love. [ . . . ]

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As you may have heard from the twitters, I have some projects going. Here are some brief descrip­tions of them. No photos, yet, because I’m writing this on my phone and don’t have any handy. Project #1: Exercise Yesterday, I went to a high intensity training facility. It’s not a gym–a gym is a place where you pay a membership fee and get to use the equipment on your own, and pay extra for a trainer. I don’t care for that. This place does personal training exclu­sively at a fairly reasonable price. They use the BBS/​​HIT protocol. I selected BBS/​​HIT (specif­i­cally as against CrossFit) because 1) the science looks good, 2) [ . . . ]

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I just received this photo from my mother, showing the method presently in use for the removal of her tree.